THE RITUAL

Her hands moved in an organized style. Her fingers ran along the box in the same fashion almost everyday!

1- Lift the box

2- Run the palms on the upper surface

3- Open it gently to the world of her own! 

The box was an ornamental rectangular box having a three piece comb set- a plain blue coloured one, a multi coloured big comb and the third one- a dark green comb which was different from the other two. There were two small kum kum boxes. The one which is the traditional silver (a small one just right to fix in the make up box) had the traditional thazhampoo kum kum in it. The other one which was a fancy kum kum box decorated with little pieces of cut mirrors had the vermin coloured kum kum in it. Then there was a plain rectangular container having the vibuthi or the thiruneer. A small eyebrow pencil, a sharpener, bun cover, a powder puff, a bindi packet and a post card size Ganesha occupied the box. The most important member of a makeup box- ‘The mirror’- laid inside the box, boasting with pride and showoff! It was an oval shaped mirror with an olive green border and plastic handle. The outer green plastic mold and the handle of the mirror had impressions of a princess. The princess smiled charmingly with her long hair and a flowered crown! The mirror looked absolutely stunning, that every time I looked at it, I thought that the one who used it probably asked,

"Mirror Mirror in my hand,

Am I looking good today?"

The make up box belonged to my aunt. It was not a regular box that had been bought  from the store. It was a personalized makeup box specially made by her for herself! When she decided to have a customized makeup box, she carefully put together a range of accessories loaded with finer details. Everything was done except for the main box. Then, she was turning the house upside down searching for the right one. She used to ask the women of the house, " Can you get me that small thing which we got as a return gift when we attended Saroja’s daughters wedding. I think it would be right. "When asked why she needed it, she replied vaguely by shooting a question which was totally irrelevant and many other times she ignored it by not giving an answer. Either she was shy in revealing the real reason behind it or it was just her way of doing things! This went on for a long time until she wouldn’t stop searching. Thanks to my uncle who came to everyone's rescue. He realized that she would never stop and decided to put an end to the search. Finally, he got her what she wanted from his own Pandora's box! 

Once all was set, she meticulously followed a daily ritual. Just before bath, she would take the ornamental make up box and settle down in a place she had selected right for that. She  oiled, combed her hair starting with the blue coloured one and then with the multicolored comb and then wrapped it onto a bun. There was a choice between the combs everyday, but I was not able to find the logic behind the patterns and how they worked! The last step would be to cover the bun with the bun cover. After combing her hair, she used the mirror to look at the right and left side. She always checked if  the lustrous fully turned grey hair was combed to perfection!

The box remained in the same place till she came back to it after bath. Here comes the interesting second phase of the ritual. After seating herself comfortably, she powdered her face with a puff- this was something that all women used in the olden days, shaped her eyebrows with one stroke and finally placed the bindi in her own style. She always used double bindis- the brown one at the bottom covered by the full red on the top allowing only a crescent of the brown to be seen. This gave a unique color to the bindi. Now comes the mirror's part which affirmed with her beauty standards. She often had the mirror in her hand inspecting her glowing face. May be she did say,

“Mirror, Mirror in my hand

Am I looking good today?”

The Gods always played a role in this self care routine! She took  the Ganesha out of the box, chanted a few slokas and placed the red kum kum first. Next went the vermin kum kum after the chant of another slokam. Finally she arranged the contents of the make up box and allowed the box to be away till the next day!

The most surprising element of the whole ritual is whatever the situation was, wherever her thoughts were, however upset she was, she never gave away the daily ritual. Rituals add structure and significance to our human lives. Rituals need not only be the religious practices or the festivals, they can be anything that gives us solace and makes us alive! Rituals can help us provide an edge of comfort and stability in this most unprecedented chaos we are living in. May be its time for us to enjoy the small daily things. It could be sipping of the morning coffee, the 30 minute mindful walk, the divine pooja room time or even the cleaning up of the personal space. Watch yourself become calmer and happier. What's your daily ritual?